EP 11 & 12: What is your enneagram type?
Hosts: Jade and Deniece
ABOUT THE EPISODE
In this episode, our hosts discuss “Enneagrams”, describing the different types, how they apply to our relationships with people personally or at work, and how to appreciate the qualities of each type.
A MILLENNIAL MESS
EPISODE 11 PODCAST SHOW NOTES
[03:08] Today's topic is "Enneagrams". Enneagrams depict your motivations, wiring, and triggers. It helps you to accept yourself for who you are and at the same time, work towards being a healthier version of yourself. There are 9 types of Enneagrams. When you take the test, you get assigned a primary type, and also a set of top 2 types as part of your makeup.
[06:10] The first type is the "Reformer", these are the Type 1, also called the perfectionists. They are principled and purposeful with self-control.
[08:22] Type 2 is the " Helper" which is the caring interpersonal type, and also generous, and possessive. Deniece shares that she falls within this group, highlighting that she sometimes does not go straight to the point because she fears being judged by others.
[09:20] Type 3 is the "Achiever" who 5 likes to accomplish goals. Deniece is also more of Type 3 compared to Jade.
[10:10] Type 4 is the "Individualist"; they are sensitive, introspective, expressive, self-absorbed, and temperamental. They are also called the Creative types, usually involved with dance, painting, drawing, or other creative arts.
[11:11] Type 5 is the "Investigator" who is the intense cerebral type. They are perceptive innovative, secretive, and isolated, and prefer to look beneath the surface of things. Their inquisitive nature helps them resolve conflicts between people.
[13:11] Type 6 is the "Loyalist" and is Jade's dominant type. They are committed, security-oriented, engaging, responsible, anxious, and suspicious.
[14:37] Type 7 is the "Enthusiast"; Deniece's dominant type with a high affinity for having fun and partying.
[16:45] Next is Type 8, the "Challenger". They are like achievers and want to help, but tend to be more aggressive, straightforward, they challenge the status quo.
[18:20] Type 9 is the "Peacemaker" and is usually very easy to work with. They try to make sure everyone is happy. They are self-assessing, easygoing, receptive, reassuring, agreeable, and complacent. Type 6,1,9,4, and 5 are part of Jade's top 2. Understanding Enneagrams helps you know how to deal with people in line with their strengths.
[23:05] Discussing more on type 2 because it applies to Deniece, other characteristics which may get them into conflict include people-pleasing, flattering, clinging, and being seductive, self-deceptive, insincere, or possessive. At their best, they are encouraging, loving, self-nurturing, compassionate, and forgiving. They would not ask questions because they think other people have more important questions. They love to help because it makes them feel good, and feel sad when their help is not accepted. This makes them very valuable at work as they are also non-confrontational so it is important to approach them by being caring.
[33:25] Jade is more of the Loyalist, which is type 6. They get into conflict by being pessimistic, evasive, defensive, negative, worrying, and blaming. At their best, they are courageous, cooperative, disciplined, funny, and affectionate. They need time for you to earn their trust and as such need to have their space.
[45:00] Jade and Deniece share that they will work on a second part for this topic.
EPISODE 12 PODCAST SHOW NOTES
[01:47] When you have a dominant type, you have a healthy and unhealthy part depending on stress. A Type 2 will move towards being a Type 8 when stressed beyond their capacity. An example would be if overtures of friendliness and self-sacrifice are ignored, they may begin to openly express their anger.
[07:10] A healthy Type 2 would be happier accepting less work, which makes it critical for them to draw their boundaries and create space. They get into difficulty when they begin to attend to others' needs without adequately attending to theirs; they disregard their boundaries and the boundaries of others in trying to help, even when the help is not needed. A healthy Type 2 would not wait for a loving response from people to feel loved, they extend the love they would offer to others, to themselves. They want everyone to thrive, rather than depend on them physically or psychologically. Deniece shares a Type 2 should always start the day by figuring out their own needs.
[11:33] For Type 6, when stressed they become more like an unhealthy Type 3; getting nervous, overthinking, self-doubting, and trying to deal with their anxiety by working harder. They may also create a false sense of efficiency. When they thrive, they become more like a healthy Type 9, learning to trust themselves more, opening more to life, and relaxing; they are much more at peace. Jade would advise a Type 6 to find their inner peace, and trust themselves rather than finding other people to trust.
[30:10] If you are in any form of partnership either as an entrepreneur, or dating, you need to understand that there will be conflict and you need to resolve the conflict. Our relationship is being brought to the test every time we work together.
[33:08] While Type 2 focuses primarily on building intimacy and positive feelings between themselves and other individuals, the emphasis of Type 6 tends to be building a foundation of security, a sturdy platform of hard work and trust, that everyone can count on. Type 2 and Type 6 are good when married because their priorities are family-oriented, and foster domesticity. They are both socially involved in their community and see great value in having many social connections which gives them the feeling that they are valued in the world. Also, Type 6 value the warmth, kindheartedness, trustworthiness, loyalty, and self-sacrifice of Type 2.
[39:20] Deniece explains that while Type 2 is generally loyal, it should not be mistaken for being faithful, as she learned from personal experience that being faithful may sometimes depend on the context or situation. A Type 2 would admire the hard work, commitment, modesty, and playfulness of Type 6. Both types are likely to admire each other, seeing each other as good and dependable as a basis for a productive life together.
[45:33] Search "Enneagrams" to learn more. Jade and Deniece recommend taking the paid test in the link.
Keep up with us on socials!